Good Inside

June 20, 2022
Psychologist Kennedy, better known as Instagram’s Dr. Becky, brings her advice to the page in her encouraging debut on how parents can “do better on the outside and feel better on the inside.” She makes a solid case that self-development and child development go hand in hand, and to help readers accomplish both, she lays out 10 parenting principles she lives by. These include the belief that all children are good, that resilience is more important than happiness, and that telling the truth is key to having a strong connection with one’s kids. Then come some strategies for increasing “closeness in a parent-child relationship,” with a focus on behavior issues: validating the intensity of a child’s feelings (“your upset is as big as this whole street!”) can help with tantrums, for example, while talking to a child about their feelings can ease separation anxiety, and recording a reassuring message on a “comfort button” kids can press can calm sleep worries. Kennedy’s points that it’s key to really understand a child and that one-on-one time goes a long way are well delivered, and the book is flush with useful ideas—so much so that end-of-chapter summaries would have been a helpful addition. Frustrated parents will find this well worth their time.

August 1, 2022

Potty-training battles, eating habits, separation anxiety, and sibling rivalry are common parenting woes explored by Kennedy, a clinical psychologist with a private practice dedicated to resolving parenting challenges. Rather than time-outs, sticker charts, or any type of punishment or reward, Kennedy encourages readers to dig in to the child's internal world and view their behavior as a cue for help or need, not an identity. She advocates for a connection--rather than consequence--model of parenting that's centered around viewing a child as "good inside," an idea that may seem, on the surface, to be obvious, yet may not translate into practice for many parents. Kennedy also includes scripts to spark conversation between parent and child on a variety of topics. She explores such issues as looking behind a child's meltdown, combating whining (a little humor goes a long way), and preparing a child to cope with separation or another anxiety they may face. Consent is a critical issue explored in this book. VERDICT The author's choice to base this book on her private practice may limit its audience; nonetheless, the many parents familiar with Kennedy's work will value her suggestions.

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